EXCITED

You know when you are just having a really bad day, week, month or even year? Well let me tell ya, these past few weeks haven't been the greatest. We are in financial distress like every other person in United States. My husband and I seem to be fighting on a constant basis due to stress from cash crisis. It's summer time and we haven't been able to do hardly anything. My best friend had been here alot this summer and that has helped alot. She gives me encouragment and enlightenment. My mom and I have been fighting on and off and that is alot of stress in itself. My husband and I are getting ready to lose alot of materialistic things. I feel like we are stuck in a huge tornado and it won't spit us out. I am overweight and have been for a while now. I always think of that, at least every day. I try to do something about it all the time. I try to eat right, exercise, take my medicine like I am supposed to. Nothing seems to be working. Well I tell my husband not to think negatively that things always work out. Because they always seem to for us, one way or another. I think my positive thinking has finally started to rub off. Our financial crisis seems to be looking better and amazingly and shocking to me I have lost 22 pounds. I have no idea how. I guess it's the old saying from dieters. When you just stop trying so hard the weight will start to drop. I couldn't believe my eyes when I looked at the scale. I had to step off and step back on just to make sure it was reading right. Then I just kept giggling. I was so EXCITED!!!! I had to tell everyone that I had dropped that much weight. I hope to lose so much more. Just to think that a couple weeks ago everything was looking so grim. Even three days ago I was on the verge of a nervous break down. I am a recovering "cutter". I have not cut in over 4 years and 3 days ago I cut again. I guess you could say that is how bad I thought my life was getting that I had to go and mutilate a part of my body (my hand). My husband was scared, I was scared and neither one of us knew what to do next. Now just 3 days later, with help from friends just listening and family just caring and my positive attitude and the support of my husband I think that we are going to conquer this to. Onward and forward with life one day at a time. Thank you all!

Days Gone By!

As you can tell many days have gone by. So much has happened. I love to write and tell the things going on in my world. I just can never seem to find the time to sit and tell everything. This morning is so quiet and peaceful that I find that it is the perfect time to say a few things. My mom had an ironic accident. It was a really scary accident and still is. She was using a post pounder to pound post for a fence that they are putting up on their land. As she is doing this, she lifts the heavy contraption and just lets go of it so it can hit the post hard enough to make it go in the ground. I also need to mention that she lives in a very remote place and doesn't really have neighbors or very good reception for phone service. As I was saying, she let go of the pounder and with such force it bounced right off that post and smacked her right on top of the head. I haven't physically seen her so I am assuming it hit her pretty close to the hairline around the forehead area. As she gets knocked silly she started to really feel the effects of the head trauma. She started getting dizzy and the headache and loss of balance. She managed to text my sister who happens to live in the same area as I do which is about 2 hours away. The last text my sister received from our mom was HELP!!! According to the doctors she is experiencing seizures which causes a headache which causes a panic attack. This is where I call her accident an ironic one because just recently she was calling me a drug addict because I take a prescription medication for the same thing that she is experiencing now. I guess that what Kharma is all about. Not that I would ever wish bad things on my mom, because I love her terribly and panic attacks are a horrible thing to go through. I hope she just gets better and doesn't have to go through all the ups and downs that I have been through for the past 13 years. On another note, times are a little rough around here. Larry and I seem to be fighting non-stop because he stresses so hard about everything. He has actually made himself physically ill over stress. I might have a new job. I get to go talk to the lady tomorrow to see. It's only three days a week but that is better than nothing. It's all night time hours and no one at home will even know that I am gone because they will all be in bed anyway. I am excited and scared all at the same time. All I have to do is check ID's at the door of a bar to make sure that everyone is legal to be in the bar. Oh my I just don't think I could handle it. lol!! We finally succeeded the Lagoon trip on the 3rd. It was me, the boys and Ashley. They were too much fun. They went on almost every ride! Even Cory. My little 8 year old was just a little dare devil. We laughed and played and froze to death. It was a blast! I can't wait to do it again. Maybe we can find somewhere else to go besides Lagoon. That way we just don't know what to expect. I'm so proud of myself! My car broke down and I totally fixed it all by myself. WOO HOO! It was a fantastic time...We were just missing one thing and that would my Jessie boy. Writing about him...He called my best friend tonight. That was such a great feeling. Jessie trusts very little people. He called her on his own time and was not told by anyone to call her. He up until now has only called me. I was so surprised. My best friend was so excited. I hope she really amd truly understands how out of character that is for him. Almost an honor for him to call her on his own free will. I just cryed when she told me he called her. I just didn't know what to say or do. Friend you are truly our Angel and I am so glad to have back in our life. Apparently there is a purpose for us to be so close again! I just want you to know how much you are loved and cared for. We will always be here for you. I also want to thank you for all your support today! Just gives me that more momentum to get off my butt and keep it going.
Love to all and Best Wishes